May 31st 2007 to July 31st 2007 = 2 months le!!! So happy! Wed is a holidae..hope dear can bring me somewhere i would love to go! and enjoy our monthly anniversary! tanoshi desu! XD...watashi wa aiishiteru dear...itsumo..aii...LOVE U!!!

My present for Dear...(Hope he reads...probably nope...)

***Stay by my side and protect me..forever..
Hold my hand tight and never let go...
Hug tight me when I need ur warmth...
Kiss my Chappy if u think she's cute...
Cheer me up when I'm blue...
Unexpected surprise is sweet...
Treat me like a princess ,like in the fairly tales...(smile evily..)
Faithfulness, trust,love,secure,commitement...is all I want from U...
When I'm sick, Kiss of Sweetness is my medicine..
When there is thunder,
cover my ears,
cover my eyes...
and sing lullaby to me...(=.='')
Our love will last itsumo...itsumo...
will U walk wif me till the end?
The end which have no ends...
is a never ending story... ***


PS: Blue black have nt heal 'there' shit...more I rub...more swollen and painful it is....SHIT....





after shopping.....juz feel so tired but den have to go to work...todae customers juz sux alot...hates it..anyway..i got a customer hu got attitude prob who argue wif me...cant stand it...feel like slaming tt person down! =( ...customer keep on coming...no time to breathe or rest...grrr..den while working..tt idle thing so pain..feel like fainting every moment...sigh..

***so much to do...no time to breathe...***

but thinking of yesterdae moment wif dear...so sweet...it keeps me going!keep thinking of dear when work...whether he have fun at his grandma bdae celebration ma..but indeed he did enjoy~! =D

***thinking of u always..miss the moment we spent together...wif hugs and kisses***

todae i have such a preverted dream...i dream of me nake walking down the street...i feel no shame..but i feel very comfortable ...weird!

***wat am i thinking nowadaes???***

blue black on my elbow..arm..br***t....DAMN idle...the mark leaving there is so ugly...=.= ...
meeting dear tml for breakfast....muz wakeup early tml le!
SLEEPY now! Tata folks!

***Can u heard the flower singing juz for us?
giving us their blessing..
their voices touched down my heart...
I feel happiness spread over me...
Somehow i feel that...
we r alive in each other's heart...***



















meet dear at cck mrt at 5pm..dear late bout 10 mins...den we on our way to vivo city to catch simpson movie..

on arriving vivo..saw too many people liaoz..den c the time slot there..7:40 time slot full...left 9pm+ de...coz is too late if watch finish..we r worried tt..we may catch no bus/mrt.So we plan to go back CCK cinema to watch...actually is not a bad idea..anyway we oni juz wasted 2 hour trip to go frm cck to vivo,vivo to cck...anyway...journey was fun and touchy!

***Love u...u nv let go of my hand...***

upon meeting dear...dear was very moody..as it also affects my mood too..so have me thinking of some ways of cheering him up..when dear nt happy i will also nt be happy de..so i have the responsible of cheering him up...anyway...he really did cheer up! thank to his gf! xiao jing! hurray! *Smiles*

reach cck around 7pm..rush to cinema buy tickets and we take the 7:40pm slot..den i ask dear we take dinner IN the cinema...so we smuggle KFC inside....DAMN EXCITING...heng nv get caught by ppl there...! *heng*

simpson movie was simply awesome...keep on laughing my head off..cause is a family comedy..the ending was expected so no surprise for me =/..overall the movie was good! =D ...keep on grabbing dear arms coz the air con there is DAMN TOO COLD..

***yes..I can feel ur warmth tt makes mi warm...***

after movie...me and dear plan to have some private times together..woohoo..best part ever XD..we go grab some drink..i go buy beer..he buy soya bean we go to our fav place...well...here I will say no more laa...wooohooo...the time here spent wif dear is the best...wat i can say is i'm too daring and *****..maybe i am the wolve and u r the sheep..dear is so shy and cute!!..today juz nice....full moon..scenary so nice...lucki i nv drink very fast for the beer...if nt i'll be drunk...and dunnoe will do wat thing..

***love ur hugs and kisses***

tml is dear's grandma bdae..if i no work..i will like to go..but i got work...arghhh..but anyway~ wish dear's grandma be happy and healthy always! =D *my blessings*

okie stop here...sleepy~





My new hair look..bro say i look dumb in this hairsyle...shit!!!



























Hopes he READ these!!! XD

1)Noes how to cook/clean/drive/sew
2)Good sense of direction
3)Kind/caring/helpful/honesty -all thoses gd stuffs laa-
4)Loves animals like dogs
5)NOT a FLIRT
6)Gimme 100% luv/faithfulness/secure/attention
7)NEVER EVER break promises
8)Mature in inner and outer
9)Gimme small surprises unexpectedly
10)Hug me/lend mi ur jacket when I'm cold
11)Cuddle me or gimme a peck on cheek when I'm feeling low spirit
12)Hold my hand when we walk..nv let go..
13)Tell me how much I love you face to face..and mean it
14)Share ur secrets/problem wif me
15)NEVER ever tok bout sweet moment u have in the past wif ur EX-GF
16)Buy me cute stuffs love u sweet sweet!
17)Stand and fight for mi if ppl bully/insult me...
18)Intro me as ur GF to ur frenz openly...
19)Dun ever joke or act like U R mad...if i'm upset pls comfort me
20)Smarter den me..not too much!!
21)Be funny and serious sometime..
22)Be naughty juz for me..and not to other gers pls
24)Protect me..even I know judo...
25)Phone me almost every night
26)When I wan his accompany...accompany pls..i dun wan excuses...
27)Morning call mi everyday without failed
28)Smile wif me
29)I will drop a hint and pls know it!!!
30)NEVER EVER CHEAT/LIE TO ME!!!








Todae have a great time walk wif dear to sch...stress bout the stupid prob todae...I damn dun understand anything todae..i deserve a C..no a D for tis prob..sob T.T

Dear havin flu todae, but he insist going to his ig...i told him not..go home rest but he dun wan..=(

todae i soooo cold in classroom..forget to bring my jacket..wanna ask dear for his jacket but he have flu which needs it and was wearing it..so have to bite my lips and endure the cold pricky sensation..like snowing..anyway~ fun ma..

Judo todae was soo tiring..1 hour+ of inensive warm up training..non-stop..juz feel like killing myself..anyway..I noe tt judo ppl there nt very happy..anyway i say nth and perserve..after tt is juz some throws training..and fighting...sigh..wat a tired day...after judo..call dear to pick up some of my stuffs den go bath..coz dear waiting for me,he tell his ig ppl he waiting for his gf...he say his ig ppl took the wrong ger for his gf...they took the chio one wat...i ugly wat...='(

walking mrt wif dear...dear say he got charms to suits this kinda of pretty ger...i so angry..and pinch dear...i ask him tt ya..i so ugly...u dun like me la?den go look for chio gf lo....y look for mi?den he say i cute ma....say wat very kind, caring....all sorts of crap...geez...think he very handsome...like all girls wanna grab him like tt....*pissed mi off a little btw* =(

In the end..i think he noes i still angry...dear sms me say *I love you how u look and how u are..*my heart abit soften..but still..thinking back wat he says..still have 3% hurt in the heart...dunoe y recently I DAMN EMO & think too much...maybe auntie bringing tomato juices is visiting mi soon!

Dear ask mi wat my ideal man/bf be...i think i write a list wish i wan my guy be on nxt post!!

***love my baby dear and my GFs***





yesterdae forgot to update on judo's accident>>>yesterdae when fight wif brown belt, I kana some injuries...she so-call punch my right eyes, y i say so-call coz judo cannot punch ppl, her hand lies on my right eyes with her whole body down on my eyes..I cant open my eyes after tt..so painful..after tt right eye become teary and red...at tt moment i wanna cry! the pain is hurting mi!tt time i'm thinking of dear..i wanna cry..and hug dear tt i'm in pain...but cant...sobz,after tt another fight...she perform a advance throw on me..she step on my chest..shld be stomach actually but she didn't...and hurt my bre**t..now still pain...shit....

***@ de moment..i'm in pain..but hu noes?I suffer alone...quietly...holding back my tears***

dear call mi at 6:45am..wake up at 6:55am...todae dressing up formal wear but i dun have any formal clothes..so wear poky red dots dress...haha reali attracts alot of attention in the public =X
met JP in woodland mrt...he also wait clyde wif me..OMG..he dress like waiter...few minutes...dear came..dear look like playboy sia...anyway..i wanna buy mac for breakfast so ask them accompany me go..after tt 3 of us walk to sch happily..

peeps in w25k...78% people wearing office wear! all look handsome and pretty huh??!!

todae module damn easy..is about good impression..bla..whole way thru....DAMN..I so angry wif dear...for some reasons which i will not say here...*not to pollute my blog*

after sch nv spoke a word to dear..dear sense something wrong and ask me...I bla all my unhappiness to him...den he say he is sry...bla bla bla...I pinch him there...and beat him..to venge my anger...juz regret nv pinch HARD!!!Swear if dear making mi mad again..i will pinch hard..kick there..slap,slam....judo throw him!!!!

***Dare to cheated or hurt me greatly..i will let u 'lai hong'(c blood) EVERYDAE...***

Anyway..things go back to track...hope dear dun be too workaholic...u too engross like tt make it unenjoyable teaming wif u..when i tok to u..i expect ur attention..like u did to other gers in our team..dun giv mi the wrong ideas or giving me chance to get mad okay?

***I'll smile even i'm angry or sad...so no one noes it...but it keeps on hurting inside me..which i rather suffer alone den rather hurting u too..even the pain u giv mi which u dun even noe is hazard...i will bite my lips and accept it till the end and endure the pain...until u notice something is not going right...and plan to lessen my pain..hopefully is not late.Why i can perserve& endure it is becoz i love u..pls pay more attention to me boy...***
©XiaoJing

well...i noe somehow the thundertstorm have stop and it went back peaceful again... lucki..it have stop..becoz i dun like thunder... u noe i hates it...even though sometimes there might be thunderstorm..i will like u to pull my head close to ur chest and cover my ears..so i can peacefully overcome my phobia...

PS: Too much metaphor todae..sleepy now!

mel and namira~GOTCHA! mi in the toliet...













photo session contiues...my head 1/4 cut off sia...=(






took some pic in class when slacking~woohoo~lovely!






dear morning call mi at 6:45am, wake up at 6:55am...sleepy..cant even climb up coz too tired..

met dear at woodland mrt todae, too bad not meeting him coz he meeting JP..so go sch alone~

Todae's problem is choice on doing SEX or VIOLENCE...I vote both hands for SEX..but leader decides on VIOLENCE...TOO BAD...SAD...anyway presentation went smoothly~Syarina do the most work despite she is sick!*claps*

sherman my xiao mei give mi a belated bdae present~so lovely!like it!THANK YOU!

JUDO was great todae, learn some topic...Zoey cant make it to Judo..*sigh* I feel tt I have improved alot! YESH!

after Judo meet dear at 7-11 den we go eat BK for dinner~

after tt go home...END

PS. tml fasi ask whole class to dress formal or office wear..i dun have it...i will worn a dress..not formal de...haha!










Cant believe I work in these junks?So bored so i anyhow took a piccie of this junk shop...





todae problem easy!my team do very well~ and we get mammie mee for the prize..=.=

end class at 4:50pm(well..tt's abit earlier den last week..at least =x)

dear nv accompany to cck todae..abit upset...coz dear wanna study..but meet JP in mrt so took train wif him instead..at least my journey to cck not boring now!

reach work place late..eat fish lie noodle todae..it sux..but have to eat it..
dunoe whether is because my ah yi coming soon or wat..i juz dun feel filling..

customer very few todae..but i lazy to work...sore throat..and tired..juz dun feel like moving my butt..

qiqi keep on poking mi and smacking my butt..ONE MORE TIME..i will ToUCH UR Br***t..LOLx! JKJK la!

OMG...how come ppl keep thinking my relationship wif dear have turn COLD??('bite lips' worried*)
answer: U guys looking at the wrong angle!our relationship is going well...

Shitty..i feel cold and wanting to puke now..always think dear besides mi will make mi feel better..better...=)

wat i'm thinking now.. Xiao Jing, u cant be always so selfish de..muz let him breathe...and not holding, him TOO tight to ur chest and not letting him go..he is a human too..cannot always suits wat U wish right? How I wish to more and longer spend time alone wif U always..but time/our habits dun allow us much..I am so worried that people around say our relationship turning cold...not true right...juz tt we dun have much time to spend together longer and I noe in class we canot behave like...tt right?(too many eyes)..juz tt dun turned down watever my offered to u can le..always misses ur hugs...sigh..*

tml UT..I gonna say bye bye to my As,Bs,Cs ... shitty helly stupid am I...





working at 12pm-10:30pm today, about 10 hours!!! CAN DIE!!!

when working, have a urge to sms dear about my tiredness and tell him i love him (qiqi's suggestion for tt =P)

too many irritating and troublesome customers todae...the shop was soooo bz!!!

keep feeling hungry when working (over-stressed??)

today juz spent my whole day at tt baka & boring shop(for the sake $ muz..endure!)

dear encourage me to smile..juz smile ... =)

soon..i forgot about the tiredness,anger& furstration

i noe tt dear is besides me...no..inside my heart..

i noe dear always be with me de!

so even i'm nt happy...u always be there for me!

thank you!








My cute little Chappy...first ever snapshot on my new HP!!!





todae wake up at 11:20am, meet dear at cck mrt at 1pm den we on our way to queensway IKEA~ woohoo~~ seen so many furniture ...me and dear wanna re-decorate our room sia!

I thinking of having a tall arm chair with a coffee table by side in my room! coz i love reading...reading and drinking coffee or tea at the same time..listenig to jazzy music...OMG..SHITTY HEAVENLY PEACE!NICE!!

After IKEA trip we go nearby hawker centre to drink the famous avocado juice!taste so milky and sweet...gonna get hi sia....dear keep forcing mi to drink...

after tt..guess wat? i go dear house to watch 'The Prestique'(dunoe how to spell) Be4 tt, we go nearby hawker centre to buy dinner, ta bao and go dear's hse to eat and watch movie...wah..the movie hor..u seen liaoz...very amusing and angry..is all about sabotaging..i love the twist in the movie...so SURPRISE!!! when we reach dear's hse, dear's dad is at home..so say hi to him..den around 7:20pm dear's mum come back home from work..I was like sooo nervous! but it turn out okay! his mum even ask mi to visit often..=D

Abit upset coz todae i thought meeting dad at lot 1 at 8:30pm...but dad reach lot 1 at 8pm..well...kana get scolded...but is worth la...i mean my dad sign a line and get a new phone..sony ericsson k610i(although ole model ba..)....OOOOOO........HAPPY!

Yesterdae dear called me...i have the urge to ask him whether he misses mi....sweetie...he does miss mi...man...love him so much...wanna hug him...haha..my cute little pooh..

sianz..tml working at 12pm...argh...but rmb...like tt more money ma...haha! wanna sleep now!





wake up at 7:45am....LATE...cant meet my girlfriends for breakfast.....shitty...

UT sux! when i open my UT...i totally stun at the questions...

todae's problem sux! but team member can get along...fuuuu...hotpants!

Discover blue blacks on my both arms! endurance* =)

Rara adds shaky hunks into our final 'thankyou' slides....COOL!!!

NEVER EVER TOK EVEN ONE WORD TO DEAR TODAE...kinda of worrying*

Throw every worrying thoughts behind and went to JUDO..

Impress with my performance today in Judo..although nid to practise more =)

Zoey hurt her elbow part! pain* but u endure it right? strong cutie ger! luv ya!

8:10pm close class~ went home wif Zoey

stop by causeway buy bubble tea....ahhh...shitty heavenly nicee~

reach home at 9:30pm+

Sleepy...having running thoughts*dun u missed me?dun u wan me by ur side always?do u care bout me?I dunnoe...*

meeting girlfriends tml mac for breakfast(Fuuu~!)..well,not meeting dear liaoz..











Woooohooo love my Lala and Lalo tt wenzhen jie jie brought mi on my bdae...shaky shaky baby...shake ur sexy body like my Lala does!

yesterdae judo i feel tt i improve abit! woohoo i can jump over the obstacle!..when ready to jump..i juz tell myself juz do it..and done it....front rolling still sux...OMG...sparring with brown belt,forget to breakfall..den...hurt my ribcage...impact in my heart...shit...shit...shit

todae..i overslept..wake up at 7:40am...LATE...OMG...let dear wait very long....sorry...i think u r angry...i noe dear like to be sch very early...next time dun meet can le...i'be meeting my girlfriends instead okay?I dun wan pull dear become late too...tt is wat dear wan ba?

serious team todae...no room for me to laugh my hearts out,no one for mi to shoot like siao...my current status is 'Undead'..pia 2 slides for dear to compile...done my work at 1:48pm...den doze off and wake up at 2:22pm.presentation went well...at least i have done something todae =)

after sch...pia everything..say wanna study be4 go home,but nth comes into my brain while studying...dear and i chat alot of stuffs today..yellow stuffs..leave sch at 7:15pm..wanna dear to go lot 1 wif me...but he dun wan...geez...sigh...he say he tired....let it be then...

go home eat dinner and 2 durians...tt's all....







wake up early at 6:05am when dear morning call mi..carry all my heavy stuffs with sleepy mood and went out of my hse,actually meeting dear at woodland mrt at 6:45am but reach there at 6:55am.

eat mac breakfast,eat hotcake meal until left last hotcake cannot finish...sobz..halfway eat breakfast,halfway study for UT ... eventually manage to scrape thru everything...

reach class around 8:30am...slack abit and start UT..blah the way thru..anyway UT turns out okay for mi...

Have fun in my team..being so crazy...lalala~! laughs* until presentation..mood in my team is relax and slacki ... grin* anyway my team's presentation turn out okay...=)

bored...very bored now..listening to other team's presentation..dying to go judo...feel like learning more technic and practising my breakfall.





Enthu in todae's problem...analyse prob...my specialist! Overall team did well! =D

About 5pm class end..chiong RJ like mad..

Reach workplace at 6:10pm..Noooooooo! T.T

Tired but happy/touchy at work!

Judo tml..packing my clothes like siao gina...

Meeting dear tml 6:45am at Mac for breakfast and study for tml UT!!!

Tml UT is purely my luck if i can pass...plus is a last min study!

I so sleepy and tired now... Zzzzzz...






I hate today...

wake up at 12:40pm head hurts...

1pm go buy lunch at lot 1...

come home eat and watch goong S.

3pm dance like mad.(Epik High)

3:30pm do my blogging for yesterdae.

4:45pm go work.

Sms dear but he nv reply until 10pm ba..=(

working sux whole dae...

oni my and mei working todae...busy like hell..

customer keep on coming..nth peace in mind...status fatique

mind keep on thinking negatively...cold....

thinking of yesterdae's chat on mrt wif dear...feeling less and less secure...

feeling very uncomfortable and uncontrollable upset...feel like vomiting...

agitated and sorrow overcome me...
-whenever feel agitated..i will feel ictchness all over my body..

think again...did i think too much?

wat i thinking...u may nt understand a thing here...
***just cant stop thinking bout it...coz i DUN feel SECURE if he does tt...but think he is not convinced...he claim he is okay wif it..but i dun..but how can i say?can i really rely on trust? is so easy to say then to do?i so afraid feeling insecure but i more afraid of losing him...hopefully (if*i give in)if i go by his way...nth will happen?i juz wanna tell him to watch his status/action now...he is in a relationship..but i dun think my msg have reached him.If negative outcome arrived (pray not!)wat should I do?i dunoe wat will i do either...maybe my hidden dark side will swallow mi...how?i in the state of confusion now...a feeling of holding back....i wan his trust!i wan his love!i wan his secure!i wan his loyalties!I wan his faithfulness! sometimes...i really think that selfishness is a good thing when comes to tis...***

oki...hope i can sleep peacefully at night after writing tis...dun think too much negative stuffs xiao jing! ... ...( can i really do tt?) cries*









OMG...forgot to post my blog yesterdae..coz abit drunk..yesterdae wake up a 9:40am den bath..actually meeting dear at cityhall mrt at 12pm but he say need be early coz HP movie is free seating,so meet dear at 11:40am at cityhall.

Wear my favourite dress tt my parents brought frm thailand and red bilabong bag....i look so ladylike!CANT BELIEVE IT!!!

Reach Suntec wif dear around 12:25pm...saw his sis,clyda and her husband....argh..nervous...but they r so friendly...hehex...the mood is quite relax so is okay...went in the threatre around 12:30pm den wait..

HP movie is abit disappointing...cut many scence from the book...i prefer chris cloumbus directed lo! Only like the part of dueling when Sirius Black dueling wif Voldemont...and HP kisssing CHO part....Awwwwww....so sweeeet......

After movie say goodbye wif his sis and hubby...we go meidiya...at meidiya..saw liting's dad and say hi to him..buy $4 ice cream, Green tea and milk ice cream...taste like heaven..! den after that we go clark quay around there walk walk..saw ben tan..well i nv notice him until he call me!

Around 6pm we walk to cityhall again, eat BK there..OMG juz love squeezing the chilli sauce infront of dear...he so freak out when he saw i squeezing sauces...haha...he say he will be angry if i purposely did this to him again....WHO CARES??? SQUEEZE~SQUEEZE...WAHAHAHA...

Going 7pm soon, we rush to the esplanade there..the bridge to settle down...around 8pm like tt....we saw FIREWORKS~I am so touched...because we standing in the right view....the fireworks are juz infront of me...so nice..like little stars and diamonds sparkling!I going there again to watch...this time i will bring digtal cam to capture the beauty!

around 9pm we taking MRT back to cck...wanna get a drink...juz rmb i'm 18 le...pursua dear lemme buy beer...asahi beer!in MRT tell dear many stuff...well...by now he should noe i very very jealous of things de..hope he keep tis in mind..dun upset,or cheated me...he dare....he will be sorry ar...coz i'm a very faithful person...if i'm faithful to him..i expect faithfulness from him too...but to him...he still think is okay to have a closeness wif his girl-friends..okay..is okay...coz I noe there is no true friendship between a girl and a boy..but love..( from Goong S) WATEVER...I GET VERY EASILY JEALOUS and alwaes think too much WAT...sigh..whenever i think this...i feel very very insecure between mi and him...dunoe y at tt time i feel very angry..

reach lot 1,quickly go fair price grab asahi beer...so urge to drink it in one shot..but muz wait lo...dun expect mi to drink infront of public's eyes ba?den he say wanna walk walk abit..we go straight to the more than words there..saw a cute plushie...aww...so cute...we went to zinc shop saw a very kawaii bag!but is kinda of creepy when i carried it...LOLx...dear say will buy for mi if i like....sweet...=)

go to fair price express there, dear buy soft drinks,den we went to park....damn...i cant hold my urge to drink beer la...reach the park..drink 1/4 of beer in one shot..damn...maybe is too long nv drink beer... get very drowsy..and very blur..reaction 50% slow...dear say i drunk...i rmb saying i'm not drunk many times...den dear ask mi walk a straight line..well i cant walk straight..keep going off line...OMG...I REALLY DRUNK MA??but not too drunk la..i still can rmb many things tt night...

siao lo....i feel very warm when drink beer...even wanted to undo a button...so hot...but dear say is cool here...how come...-.-'' ... dear trick mi by askin mi..to kiss him..i do nth juz look at him...den he say..'ya..ur drunk...slow reaction...' haha..wanna trick mi....ur dead sia...i hook my arms around him and bring my lips close to his...haha..tis time he really freaks out..the rest cant rmb sia...head hurts when i think of it...

overall....HAPPY! =)





Wow~ Absolutely enjoy my bdae today wif dear!But in the morning, the maths module sux..I totally dun understand whatever kumama is saying todae..but manage to scrape thru my team presentation in the end!Nicee team baby!

Before my presentation starts dear rush out of class room,he later sms mi to meet him 7pm at cck mrt.Class end at 4:30pm+,I chiong RJ den quickly pack my stuff ,reach home at 6pm.

Bath,makeup stuffs,everything is done at 6:45pm..rush lot1 reach about 7:01pm.
Dear abit late..but is okay for me!

alight at city hall, dear buy cake and we take away sub way and go esplanade there to makan,wow..the scenary there is sooooo beautiful and atmosphere there is very romantic indeed! totally enjoys it!THX DEAR!

we settle ourselves in the park..meet dear's juniors..well..frenz ma....den he sang mi bdae song and i make a wish...and blew the candle..before that dear wana take pic so he lit the candle, but the breeze there quite strong..he keep on litting it..haha!juz oni the cake is wayyy tooooo sweeeeet!!!

After that,we go walk around cityhall to raffles place like tt,passing many historical buildings,dear taught me some of its history...wow...he really become my tour guide ar!we walk at a path..den dear hold my waist....wah lao....my waist oni got fats sia...=(...getting touchy... todae cant really get hi coz quite tired after today's class...haha but manage to get my dear abit hi..is juz tt e dun admit it...

around 10:45pm we reach cityhall mrt..dear worried that there will be no bus to take him home if he escort mi, so i tell him nvm la...i can go home by myself...dear still worried but he say to call him straight when i reach home.

reach home around 12am..saw mum and dad come back frm thailand!wow!damn happy! glad tt they enjoy the trip,they brought mi a red poky dots dress ($15) and a red bilabong bag($20) ...SO COOL!!! I LOVEEEE THEEMM!!!

after that, found a shaky doll in my bag frm wen zhen jie jie....y shaky..coz it keep on shaking!I name it 'Lala'...a baby doll besides it i name it 'Lalo'...open my laptop I saw a capitamall $100 shopping vocher frm second bro!wowow.....Really cant describe my happiness! Thank you my family! Thank you my dear! I really enjoy my bdae todae!

sleepy now..tml watching movie(HP)with dear and dear's sis and sis's hubby....tense up....o.o






Enthu todae!my team did overall well today! love u guys!make my day so enjoyable!*rara..u alwaes making mi so warmth while sitting besides mi...ahhh...oohhh...

Sick and sleepy todae...but happy!tml is my big day...finally can watch M18 movie....ahhh...ooohh...hehe...i only wish for a present full of loveee....XD

Dear sent mi home...to my doorstep todae..so glad and touched...in MRT..dear lean very close to me...I push him away..scared I passed my germs to dear...dear say is okay..but I dun wan c my dear sick...makes mi sad too...while reaching lot 1...wanting to buy ice blend milk tea without sugar and pearl...but dear forbidden mi...T_T

Ask dear wanna come in my hse..he say got something on...hahaz..my bros all outside dating...all come home til very late..so once got home,bath..feeling very drowsy, den sleep..set alarm clock at 7:40pm but wake up at 9:10pm coz second bro called..too late to go and buy dinner so juz cook half of maggie mee..nt hungry anyway..nid to eat coz after tt I need to eat panadol..if not I rather skip my dinner..=X

Finish dinner about 10:40pm..rush to do my RJ...interesting qns todae.."Never judge a book by its cover..." write quite alot regarding tis...

Just taken panadol...wanting to sleep now...hope I recover fully tml! =D





I totally unhappy wif myself todae..first time in RP i feel so useless,stupid and useless..stupid..and useless and stupid...today problem is difficult..i spent the whole break 2nd time to research..no msning..no blogging..no friendster..plainly researching...after 2 hours,i still cant find anything frm yahoo..google...yahoo..google...damn..how useless brat am i??seeing the unsatisfied and impatient faces i know I am such a failure teammates..indeed a failure scribe too..but i really concentrate todae!i'm totally a fool..a joke..maybe..=( bitting my lips..i still continue to search for information...no..still cant find..holding back tears...no i still cant find!!!frm 2nd break till 2:32pm..i found nth and contribute 0% to the presentation...! wat a joke!

dear called me juz now..he is revising 6p...den tell him some of my problem todae..lucky dear nv blame me...he say is not my fault..he tell mi nt to blame myself..thx god..i feel so relieve...but i cant stop myself thinking negatively todae i too stress up...and get myself sick..hope tml i can go judo training...i must...

left 2 days till my birthday have to cheer up! i will try to..smile..i wan to smile to everyone...i noe somewhere inside everyone's heart..they will smile back to me..even if they dislike me..i wan warmth frm everyone...happiness,fun and laughter is wat i wish for w25k..argh..have to wait for nxt week to watch harry potter..=(

about the 'forever dun hug policy' with dear...i see how long can it last...=/ ... i alwaes the ones hu alwaes get touchy...haha..

head really hurts alot now... too sick to move on... i juz wanna cry out my unhappiness...cry abit...tt's comfortable now...=) but feeling very very sick...somebody help!








Todae sugar level surge till very high coz eat, Meiji white chocolate(whole bar),pocky milk flavor, 2 very sweet sweets and 1 packet of biscuit frm mel, 2 sweets frm JW,1 chocolate frm rara...eat until i very very hi...keep on disturbing JW who sits besides mi sia..cant control sia..being so touchy wif my girlfriends...wahahaha..dear dun angry hor...


Today's module is communication..all about plagriarism...very straightforward, therefore easy..coz is easy so very very the slack...haha blah my way thru todae...overall my team struggle wif the presentation but stuck wif the word 'evolution' which is all my fault for puting tt word on the slides!!!sorry sorry!


For the result of eating too much sweets...i get sore throat now...argh...help mi....so painful...is tt what i get wat i sow?? T.T feel like squeezing my throat to stop tt stupid pain!!! ='(


Today judo, zoey leave me around 6:45pm which after tt i desperate needing a training partner...heng siti be my partner!OMG..my forward roll still is like...i nid to practise my forward roll!!!


After judo around 8:08pm..go to toliet to strip my Gi..dear call...well he is waiting for mi outside the martial art rm...ar..so touched...i juz drop him a hint that zoey be leaving at 6:30pm..den i will be alone when go home...what he reply is like 'oh...izzit'(f i remember clearly)..haha I thought he nv wait for mi...but he did..i nv tell him i'm touched...hehex


dear say i smell of sweats...well coz i nv bath wat..after all..i playing sports so is common to be sweaty and smelly..geez...i test him whether he wanna hug mi..but no...he dun wanna hug the smelly me coz he bathe le...bad ar...=(...hmph..I was angry so i say dun wanna hug each other forver..he say okay...grrr...we got to causeway,dear hungry so go eat KFC..i buy bubble tea,sit there watch dear eat..den after tt we sit at the mrt there..to finish my bubble tea...chat some stuffs...


scared dear tt we would not be hugging from now on till forever... he realli freak out and claim wanting to take back what he say...geez...he claim tt oni todae will be no hugs...a little bit of quarrel can add abit of spice into our love...maybe??!!


ppl ask mi wat i wan for birthday..but i say i dun nid anything..coz i have wat i wan...but i feel something missing from my life..so weird tt i dunnoe wat is tt thing...dear claim tt, something missing is his love...maybe...or maybe not..>.< ...a present full of love guess is wat i want eventually??!! I dun even noe..for myself...


parents gone for vacation now..home very lonely like tt..have to take over mama's role...T.T..thinking of tml washing a pile of clothes can make mi mad!!!


sleepy now..hope is not too long!!!.ZZZzz

cant even climb out of bed todae

late for meeting dear

blah my whole day thru

ask myself did i learn anything today?

about wat?...yes..induction,deduction,arguement and premises so on...blah..

class end at 4:57pm..damn late for work again la..

pull dear to accompany me to sit to cck mrt..glad he did..=)

reach workplace about 6:10pm+..my salary...T.T

being touchy wif my colleages again

irritating customers keep coming in at 9pm+

parents going vacation for 3 days..tml departing..

wonder whether can i reach home on time to rush my RJ??

wonder can my birthday tis yr be the best among the bdae i will have in life?

wonder when can I have a peace of mind???

wonder how can i manage tml's UT?

wonder nxt week when can i watch HP wif dear..?

wonder can i really sleep tonight?

wonder how can the laundry be done when mama gone for vacation?

wonder why i alwaes think of dear...

juz wonder....ZZZzzzzzz

wake up at 12pm+

eat breakfast/lunch together

watch goong S

go work at 5pm

flirt wif working gers there..being touchy..

handle irritating bunch of customers todae

shop close at 10:50pm+

bro fetch me

rain heavily

Damn FREAKING thunder

wet..cold...shivering

2nd bro brought jap food product

dried okaka and cuttlefish

dad brought durians...(DURIANS..AGAIN)

bath

ready to sleep

ADD ON 7/7/7>>>Todae wake up at 10:40am by mama...ask me wake up to eat durians...-.-''' OMG..durian in the morning can die la..i nv eat coz i so sleepy until i go back to sleep..about 11:30am mama wake mi up again...but i continue to sleep..about 12:47pm den wake up...slack whole day..help my brother to make his blog...thinking of making a blog for my dad's shop! about 4pm go bath abit den makeup...meet dear at cck mrt at 5pm..reach cck at 5:05pm..dear still not there yet..a stanger auntie tok to me...den chat abit...about 5:15pm like tt c dear there lo...we frm cck travel to yck...long journey...but whenever i am wif dear...the jouney seems to be very fast...soon reach yck at 6pm+..den we walk all the way to ang mo kio ave 5 to eat the 'Botak Jones'...so crowded there but lucky find seats to settle down..I orderd a fish and chips $6 then dear ordered a chicken..something...forgot laa...his is $7..WAH...Eat until we cannot eat coz the quanlity of the food is so much...eat till very full...i cant finish my fish and chips T.T~after tt we walk all the way to ang mo kio hub..at that time is going to 8pm+ lo...we went across a park...something like 'ang mo kio west garden' Dear say tis park is very popular for couples...very quiet there...we went past there and reach a playground...and i saw SWINGS!!! my favourite!!!...drag dear to the playground...i play until so happy and forgot about the time...haha..den we go the the MAC in the park! so rare to find Mac in the park!!!in Mac dear ask mi wanna go to the park ma...den i say oki lo..on the way back..saw the swings again...drag dear to play it again!!!ARGHH so happy!!!this time mama call ask mi y not home yet...i juz say..still at ang mo kio...haha..playing wif swings....-.-'' Hope dear nv finds mi childish at tt time! after the swings we go into the park...is very normal to find couple inside..den we settle down a place...is about 8:20 like tt...in the park we try out some stuffs and fun part is testing him...haha fun sia...to c dear's expression like tt...well..dear as my bf passed my test..tt's GOOD!!!=D Well... maybe i'm too wild le...haha...wild at night..maybe??? o.o Hope i don't scared off my dear...HAHA...in the park the the sweetest moment...hope time can stop juz once..at the moment...nxt time i wanted to go xiao gui lin wif dear...as his sis suggested...haha! After tt about 9:05pm we walk to ang mo kio hub to take MRT...den about 10:30pm reach at cck...dear escorting mi home..in 300 bus saw my primary 5 frenz, Fahmi,cant recognize him la ..haha..den dear walk wif mi on the way home...take the lift...den dear hug mi!!!First time in my life i feel so much love..warmth...'Thank you for loving me..dear...' love dear so much!!!






ADD ON 6/07/07>>>Today is a dragging day for me...Maths + VB = can die! KUMA..is damn irritating todae! T_T...todae dear sick so nv come sch...but he still remember to morning call mi at 6:45am..how sweet of him=)..haizz....but i continue to sleep coz too tired after yesterdae's judo training...wake up about 7:30am..gosh! LATE...but lucky nv meet dear todae..so still got time to wash up and so on.About 9am reach class~ on time baby!=)...but juz c KUMA there sitting....=/ ...face black black...noe things may not go smoothly todae
=(...haha..blah my way thru todae again!!! coz of VB...but i have learn some VB coding frm andrew and understand the concept of the maths problem..can le....no nid take things too hard...!RELAX~=D...at first break mel mention she wana go for movie...many suggested to pon halfway..but i wanna go watch after sch...we(me,mel&JW) watch for 5:45pm show...after buying ticket($9.50/ea!!!) we go LJS buy 3 sets of combo 1($3.90/ea) ..all drinks and food put in our bag and SMUGGLE in!!! WOOOHOOO...Smuggle SUCCESS!!!TRANSFORMERS DAMN NICE !!!after watching it is about 8:15pm like tt bah...sooo long~ but the movie is soooo impressive!!! Muz save up for the nxt FAV movie...HARRY POTTER 5!!! MUZ watch it wif dear tis time!!! After movie go home bath..so on..dear call mi around 10:40pm..chat all kinds of stuff lo!!tml meeting dear in late afternoon to go out for dinner!!! XD...juz chat less den one hour...daddy gets angry and nags at me....tt's y i dun like to chat outside...cannot tok sweet sweet stuff..sigh*daddy alwaes got temperate temper,he not happy will pull ppl around him not happy too..especially family...which i hates most...wanna get a free income plan for my hp...can chat all i wan in my room!!!Birthday coming! I dun expect my family to realli giv mi something or cakes,somemore all are bz wif their own stuff,daddy mummy overseas...i juz wan lots of love for my present tt's all..and wanna spent my birthday..my special day..which i nearly die when i'm born...wif u..dear...argh...my head hurts alot todae...neck pain...chest pain...left hand pain have worsen..HEAL!*silent*argh...sleepy now....=.-





ADD ON for 5/07/07>>> WOW....My best judo training I ever have!!! althought I still a novice in judo, but I feel that I have some improvement today!!!Start up wif some tough warming up..PAIN* like running up and down the stairs..I juz abit slow...but I complete my warming up like everyone does and dun feel bad about it!wat I afraid the most is the training for the breakfall...coz my breakfall is not so steady yet..but manage to scrape thru wif some ding dong style..=X ...ARGH!!!Muz perfect my breakfall for my grading...hopefully I can get a coloured belt(nxt rank should be light yellow).Today partner never come so pair up wif valerie...she's not bad..juz her hand alwaes put near my chest when pulling me...there will be very PAIN* lei...play groundwork wif her...well I most likely can manage to struggle free when she pinned me down...I using the lobster(or dancing??shld I say??) method to struggle free..after my struggle I counter it by pinning her down..oni her legs are long to hook onto mine...but I keep on turning to prevent her hooking, one hand grab her behind her collar,another hand grab at sleeve..legs spread widely to balance myself on the ground den body weight push her down..by right should my chest should be completely down to her chest to make her difficult to breathe...but i scared..dun dare to realli push my body weight on her..after the groundwork spa..we having the real spa...well some accident happens..a ger..zara have her neck sprain while spaing..last match is me vs vanessa(brown belt) which I will 100% sure lose...BUT I have TRY!!!I experienced it!!
overall is was soooooo FUN!!! finish judo around 8:30pm..todae walk home alone...T.T SAD!!! but I realli enjoy alot of fun in judo todae!my memory are getting worst..i cant remember some ppl in judo...they wave at me..so i assume they are from judo...argh..my memory..getting worst and worst..even i wif dear first date anniversary aso dunoe when...argh...help me!!! HAHA





So many things I wanna do todae...but cant...juz cant..the time does not allow me...and todae i got judo..partner not there coz is her birthday today..she should go out late to enjoy...argh..todae dear sick =( he will not be going for his ig...therefore todae..I will have to go home alone after judo...but..i just dun wanna go home so early..i wanna stay outside longer...alone aso nvm...dear no there to control mi...no even my family...juz wanna stay outside late tt's all...tml module is maths...wanting to pon...so sianz and tired..what if i pon den mummy founds out??!!today module..is science and about what firefly..den dunoe wat photon...haizz...msn dear, say i very sianz...he juz blankly reply..u can do it...blah..o.o'' All the day juz msning den do some researchs...blah my way thru again..keep on thinking that..I never learn anything todae...getting boring and tired...of all stuffs...argh...someone save me pls!!!if not I gonna hang myself dead laa! argh..the sun does not shine on me anymore??!! ='( damn....left hand 4th finger still very pain...cant grab things properly...and juz drop my bag in the public while carrying it in left hand...argh..hurt my hand in judo...everytime go judo sure got somewhere injure de....dunoe next time is injuries or even death..LOLx...haizz..dun wanna think too much le..i damn tired now...hope class quickly end soon...beh tahan....





Wee~ today's i feel the sunshine shining down at me,roses peeping at me,the clouds smiling at me~LOLx wat the crap am i toking???Well i did something bold todae juz to cheer my dear up!!!think i did something very bold indeed hehe...dear really stun lo,too bad never capture his expression..so cute!!!...HAHA..so fun!!!today's module abit of straightforward...so is very easy to handle therefore around 1:40pm my team FINISHED!!!todae della fella feeling sick...so she is not on her usual self...wahahaha!nono..cannot be that bad.....=X now going home soon..@ sch library now wif dear...dear playing games..=( i writing blog lo....hope he dun get very addcited to games like me hor...so cold now..argh......COLD.....Y sch library alwaes so cold wan!!! nth much le....argh! sweet...=)





wat a day todae! a day which I only ate a meal...that is meatball spagetti from the cafe @ the library...now my stomach is burning with hunger..but going sleep soon so cant eat anythng.. today go judo and watch people fight, but never go and have fun coz..lalala~todae judo choking tactic was soooo damn awesome...COOL!!!..wish can try on someone. todae module is sooo boring..about the supid visual communication..juz blah my way thru lo...about 7:10pm pack my bag go to the secret place to wait for dear..about 7:45pm+ see dear coming along..wif a few girls...or do I see any guys??lolx...dear have more charms in gers tt's y gers stick to him wat..hmph!!!....=X den we walk slowly to mrt..coz dear carry a big big bag and tired...reach mrt...dun feel like going home...so take mrt to yishun wif dear den go back cck..when reach home dear called mi that he lost his dearly ipod...T.T..well he's going to work for it as he is responsible for it...what i can do is to support him...maybe for the time being juz share him my mp4 lo..we r the kind of people which when there's no music, we can die ar..i wll support him watever there is possible chance for me doing it or if he needs me...right?





Todae well..not myself..muz as well blah my way through...nothing goes and comes out of my mind...BRAIN DEAD!ARGh!!! leave sch around 5:10pm ..be4 tt ,I chiong my evaluation and quiz like no one's business...go work....reach workplace at 5:30pm..my money is like deducted $2 like tt!At work still crap all the way wif my workin frenz..qiqi so sicko...keep on poking my waist and smacking my butt..haha..nvm u touch mine I touch urs!!! =X See quite a number of ghost movie during work!Quite enjoyable anyway...reach home around 11:10pm...bath quickly...around 11:30pm dear call me...arrr..at that time I cant log in student VPN den restart later den can go in...chit chat wif dear den blah my RJ through..argh..wanting to go PS to watch HP wif dear...=X dying to go sia...tml maths UT...DIEEEEeeeeee...nvm tml go sch last minute study..have to wake up early tml to meet dear..^.^ nitezzz... ~.~





ATTENTION all members!!! BRA (Baka Ranger Association) has disband due to some valid reasons. Sorry to all that BRA has cause so much disturbance,irritation,anger...I as a chairman of BRA says ' Sorry to all!...Yes indeed..I have learnt some lessons..as well as... ' Well..important lesson today! And I will not make that mistake again! I have realise that I'm selfish which I dun really put myself in people's shoe...I juz like to blah my way thru...it is crucial to heard wat people says about you and you change it~sounds simple but it really takes alot of courage and determination to do it! I feel depressed of disbanding it...with so much effort or gathering the members one by one...whether by forcing,threatening or joining for fun...thinking how to expand the BRA...thinking ways like how to pursue people to join one by one slowly..den get whole class to join..I noe is fun! but fun things die down fast...well think positive...BRA have survived for 6 days! NOT BAD! I really feel sorry for my members..JP,Jo,JH,drew,Mel,Kite,JW,Rara and Nuggerts...I felt sorry...haha! I'm such a useless chairman...But I as a person will not be defeated just like that...I have to be strong in mind and body..hehex..small matters juz dun pull me down! There will be sunshine after the stormy thunderstorm!!!! WOooooooooHOooooo!!!






Today...happily eating potatoe chips..sunddenly found a cute hp accessory inside...and realise it is a image of a bear and engraved..."Kuma" in it... SICKO!!!

Joycelyn aka joyjoy/Chappy/jing

DDI, RP

13 july '89

eighteen +

baby vampire

money

shuai ge(s)

Happy, my dog

family & friends

tomato sauce

black, red

violin

milk tea, oolong tea

anime, comics

drawing, designing

Rainy nights

gaming, cosplay

Brana

Liqi jie

Rara

Karis jie

NICK

James^KOR

FisH

Golfers' Friend

Edith

Peiling

QianQi

Haziq

Farhana

JianHan

Ronnie

Joanne

Justin

Firmazsyahni

JiaWei

SaMy

Shermy

Pingy

Zack

Yuki Grace

Alison

Siti

Melissa

Ryan

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